Maybe I’m Actually Not a Christian After All

john pavlovitz

I’ve always thought that I was a Christian.

I’ve simply assumed that since I believed myself to be and strived to be, that this was enough. Though I’ve devoted my days to emulating Jesus and to reflecting his character in the world, this seems to have been a woefully errant path leading me far afield of righteousness.

Over recent years I’ve spent countless hours debating with those who contest my claims of faith; self-professed believers who debate my authenticity, my theology, my conduct, my motivations. They make dire assessments of both my moral worth and my eternal destination, chastising and condemning with great conviction.

It’s difficult to quantify just how much time and energy and mental bandwidth I’ve expended attempting to justify inclusion in their heavily fortified faith fraternity and to prove my personal spirituality valid and genuine in their eyes.

But these days I’m looking at what alleges to be Christianity in my country and I’m now almost certain…

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9 thoughts on “Maybe I’m Actually Not a Christian After All

  1. Maybe you need to channel that angry, not towards the Presidential race but where the anger needs to be directed at the Church. Especially the mega church where the pastors say God wants you to dig deep in those pockets and buy him a jet!! Look at the Vatican if you want blast folks.


    • I didn’t read his post as anger so much as disappointment, especially as pertaining to the religious organizations, big and small, that would throw their lot in with politics. This in light of the massive contradiction it represents when compared with Christ’s teachings. Additionally, it seems the more drastically opposed to Christ-likeness a politician is, the more Christians align behind them. So yes, I agree, the problem is with the churches overall, and it seems John P’s writing was more directed at them than at the political race. The political entanglements are just the latest iteration of what’s always been the problem—Christians looking nothing like Christ, and thereby damaging their own witness in the world.


  2. John thank you for this. I read the original and shuddered as I scrolled through the many comments below it. All is well is the rhetoric of opinion!

    I wonder if something else is at play – and perhaps a uniquely USA element. That when a country pledges itself so fully to God and country, the result is a confusion. “God bless America” travels. Almost as though The USA had captured God, endowed Him with a green card, and dusted him off in some museum or another.

    That cultural defining of what it means to be a living breathing and living “Christian/USA citizen” might just be the result.


    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Conditional Freedom -v- Unconditional Freedom | Just me being curious

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